Blood Feast 2016

As far as remakes go, this wasn't shit. It always helps when the movie being remade is shitty from the get-go because you might have room for improvement in that case. Here, production values are better than both BF movies, but are we really going into a movie like this for production values?

Robert "Elm Street 2 Grady" Rusler plays the new Fuad Ramses, a family man who moved to France to run a not-so-successul diner business with his wife Caroline "Stretch" Williams. Already, the cast is alright. As luck would have it, Fuad goes off his meds and starts having visions of Ishtar.

This movie takes a while for anything to happen. Sure, they had a gory intro credits, but it feels more like a flashy opening than an actual part of the narrative, whereas the original starts off with our antagonist already mad and abruptly killing. There was no buildup before because the movie was intended to be dumb, and the remake tries to play it a bit more serious. It's not necessarily a bad direction, but it isn't as memorable and lacks the camp value.

Ol' Herschell Gordon Lewis has a cameo as Professor Lou Herschell, reminding us of the good ol' days. For a movie called Blood Feast, the gore is more realistic, but there isn't that much of it. The ending is different and intended to be more deranged, but nothing will compare to the real Fuad "dying a fitting end for the garbage he was."

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