Disasterpiece: The History of The Room
I'm a Horror guy. So, most of the releases that I notice are naturally of the Horror genre. That goes for the good and the bad. There's of course plenty bad everywhere you look, especially these days. But is it just me or is the whole "so bad, it's good" thing, mostly a Horror thing? It seems to be, although, several exceptions do come to mind. One of which, I recently watched for the first time. I know I've been recommended The Room several times over the years, but didn't know enough about it to realize exactly what I was missing. But now, I know. And don't I feel like quite the fool for depriving myself of the splendor that is The Room for so long. So, today, we're going to discuss said splendor in full detail.
So, what is The Room? I mean, what genre is it? Drama, maybe? Homage to early 90's Skinemax? Possibly. It seems as though the director was just trying to make a movie which served as a love letter to himself, and proof to the world that he's nice, and a cool guy. At least that's what I got from it all. Tommy Wiseau is his name, and whatever it is that he was going for, has turned out to be one of the biggest services anyone has ever done for bad movie lover community.
Tommy Wiseau not only directed this, but wrote, produced, financed, and starred in it, as well. Without that last one, The Room would be nothing. Tommy plays Johnny, a San Francisco banker who has it all. Hot fiancee, good friends, a European accent, a positive attitude, and some weird kid who hangs around, giving off rapey vibes and making things awkward. Johnny wants this kid, Denny, to be his son, and even pays his rent so they can be near each other. I'm pretty sure Denny wants to rape Johnny's girlfriend. The awkwardness is never really acknowledged, but as sane, rational people, we the audience, could cut it with a knife. Johnny and Lisa try to get it on, but Denny wants to play with them. Johnny, who is a super nice guy, politely directs the little weirdo out of his room, as he lets out an uncomfortable laugh.
We soon learn that Lisa is a fickle little bitch, and it's revealed that she's pretty much bored with nice guy, Johnny, who seems to remain clueless, regardless of how she treats him. After Lisa's mother pressures her to stick it out for security reasons, she goes around telling people that Johnny hit her. Johnny doesn't believe it, and confirms this with a little rant on the roof, ending with a denial more resembling a yawn, followed by an epic throwing of a bottle of water, all gracefully leading to a friendly greeting to best friend, Mark. "Oh, hi, Mark!" Mark's been getting it on with Lisa. Lisa has decided she wants it all. All the security Johnny can provide, as well as the dick of her choosing. All without the guilt. Supressing the guilt only makes her come off more cunty. Johnny, however, happens to be the world's most understanding boyfriend, and proves so by showing Lisa unconditional love while she continues to "tear him apart".
And then, there's this one scene that should have had some sort of impact on the story, but didn't. Instead, it just appears out of nowhere, creates a shitstorm, and simply vanishes. Never to be mentioned again. In this scene, creepy little Denny, who is revealed to be an 18 year old, gets into it with a drug dealer on the roof. The same roof Johnny threw the water bottle on. Angry drug dealer threatens to kill Denny if he doesn't cough up the cash he owes. Denny's been dabbling in a drug that is never revealed, but before Denny gets it, he's saved by Johnny and Mark, who take the bad guy to jail, leaving Johnny to get grilled by Lisa and Lisa's mom, who are both hysterical over Denny's alleged drug use. This makes Denny also hysterical. Johnny comes back and makes it all ok.
Almost every scene after this which features Denny, he has a football with him, and pleads with anyone present to play catch with him. Denny almost seems like he's playing a different character, now. However, we're reminded of his creepiness while he throws around the pigskin with Johnny. Well, that and how awkward and confusing the script can be. Denny confesses that he wants to kiss Lisa and tell her he loves her. Johnny gives some sappy speech about how the world would be a better place if more people loved each other, solving absolutely nothing. Although Denny seems to feel better about things, which is all that matters, I guess.
As Mark and Lisa continue to betray Johnny, the guilt gets to them more and more, turning Mark into an abusive pothead. As Mark confides in Johnny about the "manipulative bitch" that's been messing with his head, Johnny starts to put 2 and 2 together, and ends up recording an incriminating conversation, which never seems to serve much of a purpose. Lisa and Mark could have easily gone on doing what they were doing behind Johnny's back, and it wouldn't have been the end of the world, but they decided to be dicks about it, seemingly as a way to deal with the guilt of betraying this swell guy. As a birthday party is thrown for Johnny, things get heated after Lisa and Mark randomly decide they're tired of of sneaking around. As we witness one confusing series of arguments and makeups, things take a surprisingly dark turn. And if this were any other movie, then, maybe it wouldn't have turned out quite so funny. But hey. This is The Room!
I get the feeling that whole thing was based on real life drama Wiseau went through, at some point. For some reason, I can see him being some possessive weirdo who sees himself more similar to the character in this movie. The funniest thing about The Room is that Nice, cool guy, Johnny, manages to come off ten times creepier than the rapey football kid with the mystery drug problem. And going by how Wiseau wrote the character, I'm guessing he's not aware of this.
From what I've heard, Tommy Wiseau is also unaware that The Room is in fact a bad film, and is infuriated that it's gained the reputation as one of the all-time great bad films. This alleged European really stumbled upon something great with this epic failure of a Romantic Drama, which sort of serves as a Softcore porno. I mean, three sex scenes in the first half hour, right? I'm pretty sure this counts as one of those. More like one of those filmed in the same bizarro world as Troll 2. And like Troll 2, there are many memorable headscratcher quotes, and moments that simply makes no sense. why does Tommy Wiseau think chickens go "Cheep"? Why did nobody wise him up before shooting? And what is with the CGI city? The weirdness is one thing, but my God, that acting and delivery is what makes The Room so... Roomy? One dimensional characters played by actors who just aren't very good at acting like they know each other. Wiseau especially comes off like an alien whose attemtping to blend in with Humans. Perhaps this guy is as delusional and full of himself as I've heard, but Tommy Wiseau had a vision of what he wanted his masterpiece to be, and he's not going to let reality get in the way of how he views the finished product. So, think what you want, and laugh all you want. Just leave your stupid comments in your pocket! 7/10
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