zed, we should collaborate on a game

@zed

I don't know unity that well, but you seem to have already jizzed out a billion games with it, so i'll let you be the judge. as i laid awake in a high stupor a few nights ago, I thought on the idea of what a ren'zed capetzeek game could even be. I'm not an avid gamer, but I still think it would be great for TE to have some form of a multiplayer unity game, even if it's a crappy top-down rpg like the ancient RPG Maker 2000. (I ain't gonna lie, I had a blast with that one).

I can provide a page to host it on, database stuff, and maybe interface stuff to edit it with, or stats or something. Not much really. You can code the basic structure of it (or at least point me in the right direction). I'm under the impression that hosting a game on my server wont crash the site because the majority of that hard work would actually be coming from unity's server? I don't know how that works.

If you're interested, throw some ideas my way. if not, that's totally cool. I've always had a vague interest in how games work, and unity does seem very awesome. Anybody else have ideas they'd like to pitch?

Shot-On-Shiteo: Comfort Food



Comfort food can come in many forms. Music, drugs, even food itself. My comfort food has always been bad Horror films. One bad Horror film in particular has been a comfort to me above all others. A shot-on-video cheesefest, made in 1986 and distributed by Troma, called Redneck Zombies. And this isn't just any old 80's S.O.V. This 'un's special. You can just tell how much thought was put into making this a fun movie, and how much fun the cast and crew must have had. It's so stupid, so cheap looking, yet, so amazing at the same time. Redneck zombies really captures the Troma feel more so than any other "Non-Kaufman". And even more so than some Lloyd Kaufman himself directed.

But let's back up a little. The year is 1999, and I rent Redneck Zombies for the first time. And I am not one bit amused. Although, it was a step up from the only other two S.O.Vs I had seen. That being Blood Lake and Violent Shit. In all fairness, this was the R-rated version I saw, which might as well have been PG. Something I didn't realize for many years. Even aside from the misplaced gore and fuckedupness. my brain wasn't quite ready for the genius level of retardation Redneck Zombies had to offer. It wasn't until 2008 when I bought the unrated Tromasterpiece DVD which was packed with extras, that this pefect shit storm finally won me over. Although, it took quite a few viewings to convince me. And now, 8 years after that, and possibly 100 viewings later, I am ready to admit that Redneck Zombies is good. Actually, I would go so far as to say Rednecl Zombies is God!

I'll get to the story in a minute. But first, what exactly is a redneck? An ignorant, white asshole, possibly living in a rural area? Yeah. Something like that. I always found it funny that the people in this movie who turn into zombies are more on the hillbilly side, with some white trash thrown in. Not so much rednecks. Atleast we never get to see that side of their personalities. But they did get the zombie part right... Or at least close enough.

Somewhere, out in the sticks, Tyrone the soldier is hauling a barrel of toxic waste. But when he burns his finger on a joint that he's trying to share with a dog, he accidentally has a wreck, and said barrel tumbles on down a hill. Not sure what happened to that dog, as he seemed to vanish right before this happens, never to be seen again. Some lardass "redneck" sees the barrel, and decides it's his. Proving so with a gun he pulls on Tyrone. As Tyrone hightails it, four more rednecks, the Clemsons, all pull guns on Ferd and run his fat ass off. So, now the barrel belongs to Jed Clemson and his boys, who just happen to make the best moonshine this shithole town has to offer. Jed and his idiot boys ponder on what this barrel could be for a while, and come to the conclusion that it's a still. And if not, then, they're perfectly willing to use it as one. And that's exactly what they do.

Meanwhile, we got a group of campers looking for a nice spot with a pond to piss in. Wilbur leads this pain in the ass group of friends, who don't really seem to know or like each other too well, deep into the woods, as the Clemson family prepare their new batch of 'shine that they're convinced will fuck everyone up nicely. How right they are. And as the Clemsons try it out, they soon realize This stuff packs one hell of a buzz, which, of course, leads to death, which leads to resurrection, which leads to a craving for human flesh. And all of that leads to a lot of gore, and dark, slapstick humor, as well as some unusually surreal moments possibly only there to confuse us city folk.

When things aren't so great, my chosen comfort food isn't always Redneck Zombies. But when I dust off this magnificent P.O.S. off a couple times a year, it never fails to put a smile on my face. And it never gets old. Little hearwarming qualities like the obvious change in seasons in a single scene, to the drunk guy who is never acknowledged, to the bad spoofing of The Beverly Hillbillies. Even witnessing this trainwreck for the 1,000th time, it will probably still not get old. Redneck Zombies is more than just another shot-on-video abomination from the 80's. More than just another bad Troma movie. Redneck Zombies is one of a kind. God-like comfort food. 10/10



#Review

Shatter Dead (1994)



While they are few and far between, interesting horror movies from the 90's do exist. After many pointless sequels and micro-budget abominations in the late 80's, the genre bottomed out and by the 90's, anything worthwhile, low-budget or mainstream alike, was a rarity. Over the years, I've come across overlooked films that may have flown under the radar, mostly from the first half of the decade, and mostly micro-budgeted unknowns that most Horror fans wouldn't even consider giving a chance. Back in the mid-90's, when I was still renting movies the old fashion way, I came across a film called Shatter Dead. Looking at the cover, I realized immediately it was something different. The tagline "God Hates You" was also a good indication of this. So, I rented it, and despite being a somewhat terrible, inept, shot-on-video movie, there was just something about it that I found fascinating. Something surreal, and original. Even hypnotic at times. And now, 20 years later, after seeing just about every S.O.V. Horror flick the 80's had to offer, I'm fairly positive there has never been anything like shatter Dead, before or since.

A bit artsy, with a dark, slightly sacreligeous tone, Shatter Dead is a different approach to the Zombie story than what we were used to at the time. But first things first. In the beginning, we are treated to a hot, lesbian sex scene between a human and an Angel, which is cut short as we are now seeing the world 17 months later. The aftermath, so to speak. One can only figure this out by reading the back of the box, as the movie gives us no indication, but the Angel on human, lesbian fun we had witnessed angered God so much that he has taken away human's ability to die. I mean, they still die, but the soul remains no matter what. The world is now in panic and chaos. People are divided. Some see this curse as a gift of immortality and embrace it. Others, not so much. Some still view the gift of life as something that should be held on to at all costs, even when death is no longer the end. The living dead are not zombies. They are unfortunates, a nuisance, often victims, and sometimes a menace. There is no epidemic. But there is also no hope.

Susan, some badass bitch who never smiles, is trying to make her way home to her boyfriend, but keeps on getting caught up in living dead bullshit. Susan has no tolerance for these "people" and frankly, is just looking for a reason to blow one away. After setting one on fire for trying to steal her gas, she gets her car stolen by some pro-death radical group led by some old bastard called "The Preacherman". The resilient Susan soon steals herself another car off a corpse, only to be forced to stay in a boarding house for the living due to a nationwide curfew. Susan meets some odd, but interesting characters in this surreal environment. Some hit on here, some want her soap, but all Susan is interested in is getting some sleep. Unfortunately, all hell breaks loose as Pericles Lewnes and Howard Stern (The New Order) go on a rampage. A frustrated Susan bails, and avoids becoming part of the bloodbath. now, once again, on her way to her boyfriend, Susan very well may regret her final destination once she gets arrives.

Here's a movie I doubt will ever get the recognition it deserves. Shatter Dead certainly has its fans, but said fanbase would mostly be within that of Sub Rosa, or just people who actively search for the obscure and unique. Dawn of The Dead, it isn't. I wouldn't even call it a remotely good movie, although, that's mostly due to the tiny budget which shows quite often. However, those of us willing to look past the many obvious flaws, might notice something worthwhile underneath it all. Something dark, something unusual. Indescribable qualities rarely captured. Director, Scooter McCrae's apocalyptic vision, along with Stark Raven's unintentionally funny portrayal of the indifferent sourpuss, Susan, makes this 90's Z-grade sorta-zombie flick very much worth seeking out. 6/10



#Review

Izzy: Portrait Of A Fucked Up Bitch



The 2000's was a decade where the Horror genre finally dusted itself off and decided to finally redeem itself. Some films went on to become legendary. Some, not so much. Surprisingly, this one really flew under the radar when it came out. Around the time movies like Haute Tension were getting so much notoriety, poor li'l Sick Girl went very much unnoticed, and as far as I know, has yet to find its audience. Today, we're gonna talk about how great this film is, and why it deserves more attention. As far as I'm concerned, this low-budget film is one of the bright spots of the 2000's. A tragic story with some very dark humor, and really no moral to speak of. Just a bunch of torture and senseless, gory killings by a very disturbed young lady.

Izzy likes to kill. Not only that, but she's also kind of a badass, well schooled in self defense, which comes in handy when obtaining her prey. Izzy is a frustrated chick. She has to take care of her prissy little brother because the parents, whom we never learn much about, are dead. Izzy also misses her older brother, who is away, fighting in Iraq. Izzy has a massive hardon for big brother, so, she REALLY misses him. The only help Izzy and little brother get is from an old friend of their parent's, Barney, some fat biker guy, played by one hell of a bad actor. Any scenes involving fat biker guy are awkward. Little brother gets bullied at school. Izzy jumps at the chance to defend him, and takes it much farther than one would expect. She kidnaps all three of the tormentors, sits them down and gives them a little therapy session to try and find out why they're such assholes, and then decides to intimidate them into killing each other, until one is left, whom she takes back to the barn where she's keeping a couple others she's kidnapped for play time. She does a pretty good job of hiding play time from little brother and Barney. Play time includes such games as Izzy cutting some guy's dick off, and ass raping some chick with it. Meanwhile, The little kid gets his arm broke and then turned into a Bonzai tree. Looking back, the little asshole got off light.

Izzy seems like a fairly decent person, at times. And at one point, she may have been. But something went wrong at some point, and she just snapped. Could it be the pressures of having no parents and being mother to her brother? Or does she miss her other brother so much that her only way of coping with this is to inflict suffering and destroy life? Maybe all of that plus the fact that her only friend is a boring chunk of shit whom she inherited from the parents. Izzy is bored, lonely and frustrated. She loves her little brother and would do anything to protect him. So, some decency does remain but her little hobby does shine through, at times, as she gives advice on how to fight dirty and giving deadly weapons as gifts. Even though she may mean well, it becomes obvious that she is becoming a destructive influence. But there is just no way around that.

For anyone into senseless cruelty and unflinching scenes of torture, Sick Girl should quench your sweet tooth. this truly is a film male and female Horror fans alike could agree on. The character of Izzy is sort of like a funny version of Juno who is more like Dexter. Izzy is as sadistic as they come, yet, has nothing but loyalty and good intentions when it comes to family. A quality which manages to not soften this somewhat likeable character in the least. A character that very much deserves to be seen again in a sequel. I hope Sick Girl someday gains the following she deserves. Then, maybe she'll come out of hiding and wreak more havoc on the world. 6/10



#Review

The Spawn Of I Spit On Your Grave



Anyone who is familiar with the old school cult classics is probably also familiar with a controversial rape/revenge flick from the 70's called I Spit On Your Grave. In my opinion, a film that is eqaually misunderstood as it is overrated. I liked it okay, but didn't love it. However, I do find interesting the influence it has had on the world of modern B-Horror and Exploitation. Today, I'd like to talk about three overlooked micro-budget films which have been released over the years, that have either ripped off or are inspired by the legendary king, or Queen, rather, of Rape/Revenge.




Last year, news broke of plans for a sequel to the original I Spit On Your Grave, entitled I Spit on Your Grave: Deja Vu, with Camille Keaton finally reprising her role as Jennifer Hills. A lot of people probably don't know this, but I Spit On Your Grave already has a sequel. Well, sort of. More like an unofficial sequel. And one that is far beneath the original, in my opinion. Shot-on-video in 1993, Savage Vengeance was directed by 80's S.O.V. legend, Donald Farmer, who was responsible for such abominations as Demon Queen, Scream Dream and Cannibal Hookers. All far more entertaining than this piece of shit. I have no idea how Farmer got a hold of this B-actress for this Z-movie, but good for him. Too bad it was so boring.



Camille Keaton more or less reprises her role as "Jennifer". A woman who was found innocent after inflicting some brutal revenge on the four men who raped her some years ago. Jennifer, now a law student, is deciding to hang it up due to the professor pissing her off, and is now planning a trip out to the country with a girlfriend. A new gang of fuckers make trouble. Rapes happen, as does vengeance. Attempts at making this so-called sequel more grotesque fall very much flat. This movie had potential, but just isn't that interesting. Savage Vengeance was originally released in the early 90's as a part of the "I Will Dance On Your Grave" series on vhs, along with Cannibal Hookers, Lethal Victims and Killing Spree. But now lives on within the Massacre Video dvd catalogue. Only S.O.V. completists and Camille Keaton obsessers should take notice. 3/10



In 2001, Director, Eric Stanze (Ice From The Sun, Scrapbook) came up with a film somewhat inspired by I Spit On Your Grave, but with a bit of a dark twist, and once again, attempts at pushing things even further, mostly in tastelessness. This little gem from Sub Rosa Extreme is about a woman named Sandy, who looks and sounds like Trudy from Reno 911! A homely, dykish woman who gets a call from her low life boyfriend who just broke out of prison. He needs help and she's a pushover when it comes to this guy who is obviously very bad for her. Sandy meets Kevin in a house where he has three people held captive in the basement, who they both know and have their own seperate beef with. At first we think there's about to be three murders, but soon realize Kevin's planning four. Before he can do anything, Sandy turns the tables, and kills him.

Now completely liberated, Sandy, whom we assumed was a decent person, decides to not let these people go, but instead have a little fun and get out some long pent up agression. What follows is some uncomfortable scenes of torture and humiliation which includes Sandy forcing one guy to take a shit and then eat it after burning his dick tip with a cigarette. One guy gets shot in his dick after refusing to fuck the other guy's shitty asshole. Another guy, who Sandy doesn't seem to care much for, gets ass raped with a big stick which atleast has a condom on it. So, atleast we know she's not completely heartless. I'm sure. I Spit On Your Corpse, I Piss On Your Grave is far more grimy and mean spirited than the film it was inspired by, and also far more pointless. Not a great movie. Not even good. But for fans of the extreme, it might be something worth looking into. 4/10



And now, for a drastic change of pace. The year is 2008. This here parody of I Spit On Your Grave is mostly just a parody/throwback of old, low-budget Grindhouse flicks, in general. Directed by Chris Seaver, who is by far the most prolific micro-budget director of the last decade, putting out such Horror comedies as Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker! and Terror At Blood Fart Lake. A guy who has brought us over 60 bad but upbeat B-movies over the years. A lot of which are better than this one, yet, I Spit Chew seems to be one of the more popular ones. Although, Seaver has gone on record, stating himself what a piece of shit this is. Chris Seaver has been somewhat of a director-for-hire by SRS Cinema (formerly Sub Rosa) off and on, so, it's not always his decision what direction he takes. This one being a good example of that. But even when out of his element, a Chris Seaver movie is a Chris Seaver movie.

I Spit Chew On Your Grave stars LBP regular, Josh Suire, reprising his role as Leo DeChamp, not for the first nor last time. Leo wins the lottery, eats some Toblerone, hangs out with his wigger pal, picks up some chicks who end up violating his asshole and balls at the request of Gareth, a David Bowie from Labyrinth lookalike. At 58 minutes, there's not a hell of a lot more to say about it, storywise. This is one weird movie, though. Even for Seaver. I Spit Chew On Your Grave quickly loses track of what it started out as, and gets more and more ridiculous with stupid bullshit and random references you might recognize in other Seaver flicks, such as Toblerone and Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air. I get the feeling ol' Seavage doesn't really give a shit about I Spit On Your Grave, and as usual, decided to have a little fun with his friends and make a ridiculous movie that no one could ever take seriously. Mission accomplished! 5/10



And there you have it. An unofficial sequel, an homage, and a really, really bad parody, with one thing in common. A connection to one of the most notorious Exploitation films of the 70's. Is I Spit On Your Grave worthy of such attention and admiration while other would-be cult classics from the same era go unappreciated, and in some cases, undiscovered? Probably not. but there's just something about a 22 minute rape scene that sticks with you. But maybe it's more than that. Maybe it's also the shocking forms of revenge, the eerie lack of a score, the retard which adds much needed comedy relief, as well as the women's lib vibe that is always present. Which is what this movie is really about. It was originally called Day Of The Woman, after all. A more suitable title, in my opinion. Then again, it may not have gained the reputation it did, or even the undeserved hate. Something about "I Spit On Your Grave" seems to rub people the wrong way. While others, it makes them feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Bleeding Skull



If anyone ever wonders what inspired me to start writing reviews, check out this site if you haven't already.

https://bleedingskull.com/

I really didn't know shit about obscure, low-budget Horror until I started reading on this site. A lot of stuff in here I have yet to track down, and probably never will. And the reviews are pretty funny.

Switchblade Sisters

Jack Hill best film he made at least to me anyways, probably in the minority on this one since he did Foxy Brown, The Big Bird Cage, The Big Dollhouse and Boris Karloff in the Isle of the Snake People and a few other shitty films he did but there's nothing like watching hot girls take over everything in there path.
Won't spoil it for the one's who haven't seen it but it's a solid 10 rating for me.


Nothing like a little Navel torture.


Also has one of the best roller skating rink shootouts ever, it's so cheesy but so fucking great.

Also Thanks again Troma for the link on ordering the DVD. Got it ordered today.

There is a God.

Good Lord.

Lep-in-the-Hood !!!!

Fuck you Lep, you no good piece of shit, I hope you fall on a spike on your bald pussy taint!

#fuckyoulepyounogoodp

Black Mama, White Mama

It's your typical woman prison movie in the early 70's but damn damn damn some of the funniest shit ever by the great Sid Haig.
To me he made this movie even thou Pam Grier and the beautiful Margaret Markov were great too.

Just some of Sid's best work at least for me it is, he's so fucking hilarious in this film.


Won't give any spoilers or do a review because I can't write for shit but it's difently worth a watch if you are into the women prison movies. To me it's better then The Big BirdCage but not as good as The Big Dollhouse.
8/10
Plus it's got pretty decent kills and there nothing like watch a women cop getting off watching other women taking a shower Lol, and watching Sid Haig having a threesome with two hot asian women.